A musician Tricked FSL – This Is How It Unraveled
By: Ray Porter
The case of xSmurf has shaken FSL to the core. He was a user that joined in 2021 and acted like a normal person at first. Later he started claiming to be the lead guitarist of the Indie band “the Lilacs”, weaving a web of lies which would prove to be his downfall. However, he managed to keep up the masquerade for more than a year before League Staff had irrefutable evidence about this. Following this foreword are three articles that detail how the information that xSmurf isn’t a part of the Lilacs and used several alt accounts to boost his team spread in real time.
Surprise arrest in Greece: LP Kerberos owner picked up by the police (Part one out of three)
Shocking news reach us from Greece, as LP Kerberos Owner and the Lilacs lead guitarist Sam Birchall has been arrested. Being the charismatic leader behind LP Kerberos’ recent success, culminating in their promotion to the first tier, it is still unclear on which charges Birchall was arrested. Birchall is also known under the alias @𝓍𝒮𝓂𝓊𝓇𝒻𝟣𝟧𝓍 , which he uses on multiple social media platforms. LP Kerberos is yet to make a statement on the arrest.
With the future looking uncertain, their Captain, Jethro, will be taking on the day-to-day operations at the club for the unforeseen future. Kerberos collected seven points from their opening four fixtures. However, this upset might overshadow Kerberos’ weekend fixture against FC Berlin. The German’s hope to grab an upset result on the road.
As things stand, there is no further information on Birchall and his arrest. Should new developments arise we will update you as soon as possible.
Sam Birchall – Criminal or Victim? (Part two out of three)
The Chief of the Athenian Police has come out with horrifying news concerning the ‘Sam Birchall’-case, as he confirms numerous rumors: Sam Birchall is in fact not the lead guitarist of the Lilacs! At least not the Sam Birchall known as ‘@𝓍𝒮𝓂𝓊𝓇𝒻𝟣𝟧𝓍’. ‘Smurf’ will be charged for identity theft in Greece.
The Police’s case is based on independent research, which is centered around differing statements on Birchall’s employment. Smurf swears that he works as a guitar teacher in addition to ‘his’ music career. Sam Birchall, on the other hand, works for an industrial company.
Additionally, Smurf has only shown himself in pictures, avoiding the limelight and interviews. While very suspicious, it is something the Owners of FSL’s clubs are known for. However, all of Birchall’s pictures can be found on social media platforms of the Lilacs or Sam Birchall. This further cements the idea that Smurf is not who he claims to be.
Further suspicions were raised over the Sponsorship of the Lilacs, Smurf’s alleged wife and some discrepancies with his age.
Concerning Smurf’s real identity, some theories conclude that Smurf is a Sam Birchall, but works as a guitar teacher and has no connection to the Lilacs. Others claim that he is Alfie Burgess, a kid from Stockport. All in all, it is unclear if Smurf even has the legal rights to own a club.
It is unclear if the Lilacs’ Sam Birchall will press charges. He isn’t available for a statement. Additionally, we have no information about possible consequences for him and his team in FSL. It is up to debate whether Smurf will remain in the Boardroom of FSL following his blatant breaking of League rules.
Identity theft is a real crime, and if Smurf is found guilty, the consequences will be enormous. We at Forta Evening News condemn this crime.
LP Kerberos in even more trouble following identity crisis
A little bit of Gomersall in my life, a little bit of Stevenson by my side, a little bit of Matty in the sun, a little bit of Ollie all night long, a little bit of Georgie here I am, a little bit of them, and I’m your man(ager).
Everything is unraveling for LP Kerberos at a concerning speed. After their owner was arrested for identity theft, the League Office has been keeping a keen eye on the club. Their decision was vindicated by the fact that four of Kerberos’ players have been registered under false information.
It has been made clear that this action came through the initiative of the arrested owner ‘Sam Birchall’. Allegedly, four players were playing under false aliases, making their registration null and void. The players were playing in alternative leagues hence they couldn’t be registered for LP Kerberos. In a report, the League Commission called the players “alts” and their respective player profiles “alt accounts”.
The list includes Defender Greg ‘Own Goal’ Stevenson, Matthew Johnson, Ollie Angleasa and David Gomersall, who are all proven to have falsified information in their registration. Concerns about their identities were running rampant ever since they joined FSL. But still the four players were allowed to join the league and Smurf’s teams.
The players were suspicious as they were never seen outside of the games, rarely featuring in the player meetups and missing training. All four players will never feature in another league game for FSL, as their registration will be revoked.
This could severely weaken Kerberos’ title push, especially with Dave Gomersall being their top goalscorer. Smurf, playing in the league under the alias George Charles, has revoked his own player license at the time of writing. It is uncertain in what way or if he will be punished.
Especially spicy: Smurf has created ‘socialism’ a system in which players would give less endowed players parts of their wages. This system led to immense profits for his ‘alts’. We will see if Kerberos and/or its players will try to prosecute him for this reason. It is clear for everyone to see that Smurf’s system of lies and self-centered profit-seeking is falling down like a house of cards.
